You cannot just say, ‘I don’t want to be selfish.’ It means nothing. What is the nature of the self? What is its structure? To inquire into that requires tremendous attention. I begin to inquire or observe what selfishness is in my relationship with another, intimate or not. I observe in relationship how I behave, how I am always thinking subtly behind all the words about my own fulfilment, desires and passions. So there is no relationship. Each is pursuing their own line, like two railway tracks never meeting.